The first day

December 13, 2011,

Today has been monumental, and it's only 12:48pm.

God is so good, why do I ever doubt?

I woke up this morning (after going to bed at 4 am catching up with my "brothers" from church whom I hadn't seen in FOREVER, whoops) to go to my first day of personal training!
Now, most people would dread this fact, dread the thought of working out, sweating, lunges, burning legs and arms, but I'm a rare breed when it comes to working out.  I enjoy it, because I know it's doing something positive for my body.  But as someone who works out 6/7 days a week (usually, I'm not perfect by ANY means) I felt as though I was out of options and stuck in a rut of monotony of switching between running outside, playing basketball, etc.

So.  10 o'clock came and I got to work.  By 11 my thighs and arms were burning, I was sweaty, and I was satisfied with the workout.  I was also happy to hear that I didn't have to work out for 2 hours to burn the necessary calories to help reach my weight goal.  As a music major, this is absolutely MUSIC TO MY EARS, (Legitimately no pun intended there) because I literally have no time as it is, even though I make time to workout.  I'm very excited to be working with my trainer, Kyler, 3 times a week over this winter break. I'll keep ya posted.

So, contrariwise then I came home and the stupid devil tried to get into my thoughts, telling me I was ugly, fat, unloved, etc... the usual of what he does to girls.  So after coming to my mother tearing up and feeling sorry for myself over that, along with a number on the scale that I will not post on the internet, we began to sort out my feelings, and she began to be the best mom ever, like usual.
*thatwasthelongestrunonsentenceeversorry*

It literally ended up being one of the most amazing hours of my life.  My mom really opened up about some struggles with self-image issues she went through in college and how I truly am not alone, she promises.  God really opened up my heart to be receptive and not reject her love and advice like I had done in years past (because I was so unhappy with myself) and it was a really healing moment.

Side note- *My mom and I have a very healthy, loving relationship, I just get ornery sometimes and don't like to hear advice I just want to wallow and be negative.*

Anyways.  We talked for a whole hour, and after both crying I felt so much better, and am absolutely looking up toward these next 4 weeks of eating extremely healthily, cutting out all sugar and dairy, and trusting God for results.

In Jesus Name,
Amen.

Megan :)