Tuesday, December 13, 2011

The first day

December 13, 2011,

Today has been monumental, and it's only 12:48pm.

God is so good, why do I ever doubt?

I woke up this morning (after going to bed at 4 am catching up with my "brothers" from church whom I hadn't seen in FOREVER, whoops) to go to my first day of personal training!
Now, most people would dread this fact, dread the thought of working out, sweating, lunges, burning legs and arms, but I'm a rare breed when it comes to working out.  I enjoy it, because I know it's doing something positive for my body.  But as someone who works out 6/7 days a week (usually, I'm not perfect by ANY means) I felt as though I was out of options and stuck in a rut of monotony of switching between running outside, playing basketball, etc.

So.  10 o'clock came and I got to work.  By 11 my thighs and arms were burning, I was sweaty, and I was satisfied with the workout.  I was also happy to hear that I didn't have to work out for 2 hours to burn the necessary calories to help reach my weight goal.  As a music major, this is absolutely MUSIC TO MY EARS, (Legitimately no pun intended there) because I literally have no time as it is, even though I make time to workout.  I'm very excited to be working with my trainer, Kyler, 3 times a week over this winter break. I'll keep ya posted.

So, contrariwise then I came home and the stupid devil tried to get into my thoughts, telling me I was ugly, fat, unloved, etc... the usual of what he does to girls.  So after coming to my mother tearing up and feeling sorry for myself over that, along with a number on the scale that I will not post on the internet, we began to sort out my feelings, and she began to be the best mom ever, like usual.
*thatwasthelongestrunonsentenceeversorry*

It literally ended up being one of the most amazing hours of my life.  My mom really opened up about some struggles with self-image issues she went through in college and how I truly am not alone, she promises.  God really opened up my heart to be receptive and not reject her love and advice like I had done in years past (because I was so unhappy with myself) and it was a really healing moment.

Side note- *My mom and I have a very healthy, loving relationship, I just get ornery sometimes and don't like to hear advice I just want to wallow and be negative.*

Anyways.  We talked for a whole hour, and after both crying I felt so much better, and am absolutely looking up toward these next 4 weeks of eating extremely healthily, cutting out all sugar and dairy, and trusting God for results.

In Jesus Name,
Amen.

Megan :)

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

It's been a while...

December 7, 2011

Hey readers. So sorry this last month has been absolutely ridiculously busy, and honestly, I've just forgotten to post.  Where do I begin.

Let's start with Thanksgiving... I had an amazing time at home with my family! :) I love them so much and I can't believe it was 2 weeks ago already.  Things here in Nashville move so quickly! It was so wonderful to be home and have some great home cooking, sleep in my own bed, spend time writing and recording. God is so good!

I've been playing basketball 3 times a week with all the boys here at Belmont.  They call it "noonball".  I've kind of had to prove myself as a player, but it's been a great challenge.  Having never really played 1) with a guys sized ball (29.5 as opposed to a Womens 28.5) my shot has to get used to it every time, but I score at least a couple times and just try and rock people with picks and such.  And it's a good thing I can run.

God has also blessed me with some new friends in my life.  I won't name specific names on here, but He's good literally ALL the time.  I'm really putting my faith out there and learning to get my feet deeper and deeper into the water of trusting Him with everything, giving my innermost struggles to Him and laying them down at the foot of the cross. Nothing is impossible, and Nothing can't be accomplished through Jesus.  Easier said than done, yes, but every day is a step.

Also, Christmas at Belmont was this week and it was AMAAAAAAZING. WOW.  400 some singers and like 20 different groups singing with a full orchestra, even dancers! Belmont is amazing, and sorry, there's no school like us.  There's a reason it's on national television. Airing on PBS Christmas Eve at 7pm Central Time. WATCH IT ITS SO WORTH IT. I literally cried during a couple groups, and I know others did too, even though I'd heard those groups before and knew the people.  
Oh, and nbd but... LAURA BELL BUNDY was our host.  We got to meet her, she performed. She's fabulous. OH, and she has a Chihuahua dog that I'm 99.9% sure was the dog they used when she was Elle in Legally Blonde. For those of you who are like who the heck is she? She was the FIRST Elle on Broadway of Legally Blonde the musical. SHE CAN SANG.

Lastly, it's finals week and today is "dead day", though campus couldn't feel more alive. We had a pancake night put on by university ministries and it seemed like all of campus showed up! It was awesome!!! :) 

p.s. God has given me the first 5 songs of my album. I couldn't be more excited!!!!!
p.s.s. God is really teaching me not to worry about "the right boy", and to just focus on becoming the best me I can be first, and then just trusting that "he" will come when the time is right. Thank the Lord I have well.. the Lord on my side who is working all that out so I don't have to. 

Love,

Megan :)

Friday, November 4, 2011

God is SO GOOD

November 4th, 2011

Before you read, check out the official youtube video of the day!
http://www.youtube.com/user/seanswanson1967#p/a/u/0/bTK7GhiNg0U

From Church on the Move Omaha's worship service 3 weeks! :)
Amazing Kari Jobe Song: "You are Good"

So whoever said God wasn't good is the biggest liar on the face of the Earth.

It's Friday, and I cannot even BEGIN to tell you how amazingly HUGE God has moved in my life this week.  From the outside eye, it may not look like much, but if you've followed this blog before you know that I've been going through little struggles the devil tries to put in my way to see if I'll turn to him instead of my Great Lord Jesus.  It didn't and never WILL work.
So God thing #1. Wow can I even remember back this far? There has literally been at least one every single day.
Let's start with... Tuesday shall we? Well. Tuesday was my AWESOME BIG BRITTANY'S Birthday!!! Wooooo! So that was a God thing.  She's 20, and flourishing if I do say so myself.  She has been SUCH a blessing in my life spiritually, emotionally, and in every way and it's only been what... 2 weeks since she's been my big? If that?
For all of you whom don't speak "sorority", a "BIG" is someone who is in your sorority and basically serves as yo mama for the next... well... the rest of your life.  They're a mentor to guide you through college, be your shoulder to cry on, late night ice cream buddy, or just someone to talk to.  And in my case!!! I'm SO lucky because she LOVES Jesus SO much with ALL her heart so we can connect spiritually as well and hold each other accountable!
And did I mention she's a photographer... hello album cover!? :)
Love you Brittany Marshall!!! :)

Oh! And I completely forgot. Tuesday night was the panel discussion about the "common book" we freshman all had to read at Belmont this year called "The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks". It's a long story but basically her cells completely changed the course of human history and science for literally EVER, and her family wasn't compensated and STILL isn't compensated one bit for it.  That's the SUPER short version.  and Henrietta's (whom is deceased) son Sonny Lacks WAS HERE AT BELMONT!!!! It was SO cool to see a character in the book who after having read his ENTIRE LIFE basically was right in front of you in the same room!! SUCH A BLESSING!

Then LASTLY, I went to Bongo to get some coffee with my best friend Sarah Beth... woo! And then went to the library to study.  Although little studying happened because Sarah and I have ENTIRELY too much fun together... *cough... and Sarah was on sporcle the whole time* God really moved that night.  Because..... about an hour into "studying" my good friend and sister in Christ Lindsay showed up with her friend CAROLINE! We ended up watching sappy AMAZING wedding proposal videos like this one:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=1BE0fI9oUcM
literally if you don't cry you don't have a soul. Sorry.
and pinning on PINTEREST ALL NIGHT LONG! Laughing too, which is illegal in the Library.
Anyways... new friends are always a blessing! God is GOOD! Especially when you find out Caroline had been in your same Theory class all semester but we sat on opposite sides of the room so we never noticed. #fail. bahaha.

So now let's move to Wednesday.
Wednesdays are literally ALWAYS crazy.
I have 6 classes. Enough said.
But I ended up only having 5 because the last Oratorio meeting was at 3pm and only lasted like 10 minutes!!! Woooo done with Oratorio! People might ask... "ok Megan what the heck that's not a blessing how God moved in your life... we all knew it wouldn't last long." But excuuuuuse me? You can't tell me what a blessing in my life is! Shoot. Hehe. ;) I had an extra hour and 50 minutes to do what I pleased with!! That IS A BLESSING!
THEN! I had the MOST amazing night.

So! What was originally a "Family dinner" (Sorority thing.) turned out to be a night at Sweet Cece's!! Woo FroYo! :) With Kelly, Brittany, Ashton, Lindsay, and Alexis! :) THEN! I had to get groceries so my AUNT ASHTON and I went to Whole Foods! (YUMMY) and got some DIN DIN and then some groceries! LOOOOOONG Story short, now Wednesday night is our "Ashton and Megan date night" where we'll get fresh groceries that are pleasing to our bodies and good for them, while getting to fellowship and talk about JESUS!!! :) Which we DID. All night.  For a "Baby Christian" (Ashton has only been saved for 6 months) she is one of the most SPIRITUALLY ON FIRE people for Christ you will EVER MEET, and I'm obsessed with it!
-Meeting cute boys who ring up your groceries who are hipster-ish and ask you about your life or stare at you while you pick out granola isn't a negative either. ;) tehehe.

GOD IS SO GOOD!

Thursday... was just great. I've been in the Word of God SO much and it's really paying off! I've learned to look at my eating habits as not just pass/fail but just as "ok, does my body need to be nourished right now?" And it's changing my life.  And if I do eat late at night sometimes, or have the occasional froyo with my sisters, it doesn't mean I've failed, it just means I need to try to do better the next day.  Since I'm a bit of a perfectionist this can be REALLY hard, but through Christ Jesus and Him alone, He can RENEW my strength, especially my inner strength (aka shutting down my thoughts and helping me focus on Him and not myself) I can heal. And I AM! :)

Friday.
Woah. Last night was phenomenal.
First it was Bethel Women's Bible Study, circa Moriah's room. AMAZING. I love you girls. Love this Bible Study. Interested? Ask me it's AMAZING! :)
Then... I spontaneously went to the Jon Foreman concert!! Woooo! (With the fabulous Taylor) and it was GREAT. Ended up meeting some GREAT NEW FRIENDS! Possible band mates? Who knows. AND I MET JON FOREMAN TWICE AND THEN HE FOLLOWED US TO CAFE COCO AND WE TALKED TO HIM FOR A WHILE!
Then his whole band, wife, and team sat right by us for like 2 hours.
YAY NASHVILLE!

Then I went to bed at 2, and only had one class today.

PRAISE GOD!

Blessings to you readers!

In Him,
Megan :)

Saturday, October 29, 2011

With it.

Hey guys!

So I'm home again!
I love being with my family!
Here's a video to my latest commercial seminar performance!
I finally have a youtube account. :D I feel "with it". haha.

http://www.youtube.com/user/meganswansonmusic

tell me what you think on twitter/facebook!
@megan_swanson on twitter or
Megan Swanson on FB! :)

<3 Megan :)

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Retreat

October 23, 2011

There are no other words than "high" to describe how I'm feeling after this weekend with my sorority.
Now, before you start freaking out thinking that Megan has gone off the deep end, let me explain what I mean.

This weekend, I experienced over a full 24 hours with the SAME ~125ish people, in usually a confined space/area... and there wasn't one single big problem with anyone.  We all represented what sororities are actually supposed to look and act like, be like, represent.  I can't tell you guys who aren't in my sorority some specific activities we did... or if I can I just always feel like I can't because I'm breaking a rule of some sort, but I can tell you a few things!!!

Like:

1) I jumped off of a 33 foot platform called the fall of death or something, AND I RANG THE BELL. *pat myself on the back for that one*.  You basically climbed up a tree that swayed 1 1/2 feet either way as you were going up and had to somehow make yourself stand up while holding on to um... NOTHING.
Did I not mention the space you stood upon was literally the size of a shoebox?
You're harnassed in of course, but that's not helpful to the mind when you're suspended.
Anyways... I was the last to go in my group and it was instinctive, I knew I'd be sooo ticked at myself if I didn't do it.  And I was one of two people to ring the bell as you were jumping off (you tried to wack it with this short pool noodle lookin thing) and I felt prettttttty great.

2) I met soooooo many more of the actives this weekend and really got to know some more pledges AND actives.  In simple terms, I love every single girl in my sorority, for our differences, and omg mostly for our oddities.  I literally received a message from someone saying "Yae I'm so glad you're weird I haven't found a pack of weirdos to hang with in a while!"
Perfect for Megan? Um yes.

3) I got to experience Dunkin Donuts for the first time today.
This is good and bad.
Good, because everything there is DELICIOUS and they have free samps.
BAD because now I want it all the time and their vanilla chai tea is only $1.69 and tastes like heaven. Literally.
They also messed up my order and gave me a blueb muffin instead of a pumpkin one. Safe to say I got to keep both, without much convincing.

4) I am so incredibly proud to wear the AST letters... it's truly the best decision of my life.  These girls will be my bridesmaids, my sisters, my friends for life.  LOVE YOU AST!!

Love,
Megan :)

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

October 19, 2011

Hey everyone!

So it's only 10:52am and it's already been a FANTASTIC day!!
I'm currently reading this WONDERFUL book by Candace Cameron Cure, yes the "Candace Cameron" from "FULL HOUSE" the TV show.  She's an amaaaazing Christian woman and has really transformed the lives of many women through her books, lectures, etc...

The book is called "Reshaping it all", and if you know me at all, you've known that I've struggled with self image and being content with just all encompassing the way I look.  The book talks about Cameron's testimony of how through the entertainment industry, and marrying a Pro NHL Hockey player, she faced much adversity with feeling like she had to be perfect, and a toothpick.  She went through a short faze of bulimia (I've never had an eating disorder, I love food WAY too much) but then after, God showed up and really showed her how she should be living.

Through finding out who she is in Christ, I mean REALLY finding out and knowing how much God loves her, and each and every single one of us, she was able to look at weight loss in a healthy, manageable way, and has kept it off for over 15 years now! Her main points of focus are through focusing on the Word, and really putting your faith at the forefront and to the test, we will no longer look at food as something that controls us or that is constantly on our minds, but something that adds to our life as a supplement.  Also, one thing that has really stuck out to me so far is that when I think I'm hungry, I have to ask why am I hungry, and if I'm eating just to eat, because I'm bored, because I'm emotional... etc. It really put it into perspective for me.  Food shouldn't be something that you eat and eat and eat just because you feel like it's the one thing you can consistently have control over, aka my problem haha, but rather should be eaten when your body needs it to give you more energy and more fuel, in correct portions.
Wow run on sentences, sorry, haha.

So I'm starting on this new revelation.  It's making me focus more on the Lord and take my eyes off of myself, which is something that I've wanted for so long.  Eating until I'm satisfied, not full, and not just eating to eat but really stopping to think WHY?

Anyways... done with that rant.

On a happier note!!! BIG LITTLE WEEK IS THIS WEEEEEEEEEEK!
I got my first presents today!!!
A BEAUTIFUL AST Wreath, and a basket full of frog stuff (our mascot) and a tshirt!!! :)
So adorable. I'm so happy and excited!!


Love,
Megan :)

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

October 18, 2011

Hey readers,

So currently I'm sitting in the Omaha airport waiting for my plane to Atlanta, connecting to of course, Nashville.  It leaves in about ten minutes. Time to come "home" from fall break 2011.
It's been an amazing time.  I got to experience COTM again leading worship, and was fed by the Word and wonderful people all weekend!
Though I got to bed super late pretty much every single night, I got to sleep in my own bed which is always a blessing.  Praise God.
My mommy even cleaned my room meticulously so when I came home it looked like a hotel room!!!!!
Craziness, if you've ever seen my room on a regular basis. It's... not clean.

God has been really blessing me lately, in numerous ways for numerous reasons.
It is manifesting in my life that I don't have to worry about the future, or my music, or my career, because He's seriously got it ALL handled, even if I feel like I'm not doing enough.
"Fervent prayer avails much". So true.
I'm trusting God as the leader of my life to be my provider, healer, forgiver, Dad, lover, friend, companion... my everything, and it's so worth it.
He answers my cries and rejoices when I trust in Him.

When I am weak, He is ALWAYS Strong.
That's so comforting.

So anyways, Omahans, it's been wonderful spending quality time with y'all this weekend, and I wish I had more time!!!

I will see you all in 2 weeks! Hopefully. I'm here for literally like a day, haha.

Love you all!!

Megan :)