Jan 22, 2012

January 22, 2012

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3nCXNqqYAQ&feature=g-upl&context=G2f10f84AUAAAAAAAAAA

9:15am woke up for church.
Dressed, Check.
Makeup, Check.
Hair, Check.
Make shake in the blender and run out the door, Check.

Late for leaving at the allotted 10am... Check.

10:15am Car doesn't work and is dead again, Check.
10:16am Drive Bevin's car, Check.

10:20am Go to church, Check.
10:35am arrive late as usual to church, Check.

We go through day by day... forming a checklist in our brains for even the most mundane of activities...

I realized today that I need to step back and let God in to every little part of my day.

For instance, I went through today without reading my Bible, and it's currently 8:42pm.

Yeah, I went to church and worship and the sermon absolutely rocked my world, but because I didn't have the word and time of meditation in it in my heart, that happiness and spiritual high slowly faded.

Then came 4 hours of homework and practicing which I felt good about because I got a lot accomplished, took a short 20 minute nap, and went to my sorority weekly meeting.

I have to admit I was very overcome with negative emotions tonight because UNITE @Bethel (my church) was tonight, and I couldn't go. (It only meets once a month, and it's my only outlet to get to know other college students from my church. I can NEVER go.)

Then a series of... not to sound cliché but "unfortunate events" happened. Which I will not post on the internet, but they slowly spiraled my mood down into the dumps.  I know that if I had the Word of God in me today that I would have been able to find the positive spin on this.

-In the course of literally 1 hour I was overcome with sadness, stress, feeling rushed, confusion, and feeling totally overwhelmed with overcommitting my schedule and not having time to... breathe.

The Bible says that the Lord is our
Healer
Provider
Lover of our Soul
Protector
Guide
Savior
Friend
Awesome
Redeemer
King over All

So... why didn't I just look at any one of those things and feel better?

I hadn't meditated on the Word, so it wasn't the first thought that came to my mind. Literally.  I chose to let my thoughts run rampant because I chose to be sad, angry, and hopeless.

But Jesus already died on the cross for my hope, for my stress, for my schedule, for my overcommitting self, for my tears, for my friends, for the people in my life who are hurting and I just want to hug them and help them without taking their burdens on myself.
He died for you, He died for me, He died for everyone even if you've never spent a day of your life with Him.
He'll never fail, He's always there, He'll always protect you, He'll never leave you, He'll be the sunshine on your rainy day, He'll be your arms when you're lonely, your Guide when you're feeling lost, your Savior when you feel like no one loves you and you don't know what the future holds.
And He's your friend. He's my friend.
We're never alone.

We aren't carnal beings, we're spiritual beings of Heaven, that Jesus, the perfect man paid for with the eternal price. He didn't HAVE to, you know.  But He knows every thought you'll ever have, everything you'll ever do, and He's got a plan and purpose for your life.

We don't have to know HOW, because He's the God of the how.

We just have to pursue righteousness, flee from the devil, and trust.

Trust that He'll take our little hand as if we were 5 years old again... and lead us.  Not into temptation. He'll deliver us. FROM the evil snares of the devil.  Because He sits on the throne, in the Kingdom, where He holds All power, All Glory, and All Honor, Forever.


So this may have not been very poetic, but it was certainly on my heart.

God I don't know how you're gonna work out my life right now, but I CHOOSE with an outcry of faith that I KNOW You'll do it.  Because to You, I'm worth it.

I love you Abba Daddy,

Megan.